Being The Fastest Around Campus: The Need for Speed
-BTFAC
-Asserting one's place on the APU's totem pole via means of campus travel
-Burning calories and speed: two birds with one stone
-Longboarding regardless of weak equilibrium
-Methods may or may not include the following: walking, skateboarding, cycling, sprinting, wheel barrel races, soaps, chariots, moon shoes, razor scooters, rockets, Mario's cape feather, horseback, bed races
-Knowing all secret shortcuts on campus
-Knowing every crack en route to avoid gnar face grind ups.
-Regardless that the fine for J-Walking is $108.00 according to section 21955 of the vehicle code, it's quicker than crosswalks. Worth the risk
-Girls like fast men
-Only stop to chat if it's 911 worthy
-Means of travel lesser known:
-Call in a ride from campus safety
-Drive from East to West (see #6)
-Fake sick so you don't have to walk to class.
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