Thursday, March 26, 2009

#17: Campus Safety

Campus Safety: Bringin' the Heat Since 1899

-To serve and protect a smile
-Rigorous training required to obtain officer status
-Why be a student when you can keep your brethren secure?
-Top priorities of Campus Safety:
--Parking tickets
--All hands on deck for fire alarms
--Lock outs
--Driving the egg car around campus
--Keeping a crisp crease in their uniform
--Staying in top physical condition
-Disclaimer: Undercover officers lurk
-Intimidation is their main weapon
-Former officers include: Indiana Jones, Goliath, Stephen Lambert,
Luke Skywalker, Brice Meyers and Hugh Jackman
-59% of your spent Cougar Bucks fund the force
-"Who needs bullets? I have pepper in spray form."

No comments:

Post a Comment

Hit Counters