Thursday, March 26, 2009

#18: The Trolley

The Trolley: (Car)Pool Party!
-All vehicles are designed with complementary colors
-Luxury seating
-Maximum capacity: none
-Jolly Trolley: RIP
-360 degree cabin view
-Poles dispersed throughout: purpose unknown
-Post chapel boarding--more hectic than standing in line for Black Friday with your Mom
-West to East campus includes Annex tour
-Not included in Scraps Initiative
-Always on time?
-Easily forced conversations due to lack of evacuation capabilities
-Radio selection limited to AM 740 "KTRH: More stimulating talk radio." or 94.7 "KTWV: The Wave"
-Babe scoping
-Carry on any nutritious meal to make it "Fast Food"
-Horse power does not apply to the trolley. It's called Cougar Power, baby.
-APU is so private, they don't want you to even walk outside of the campus
-Quick paced walking in the direction of the departing trolley results in on board passenger amusement
-World's first non-rail rail car
-Highly varnished seating leads to SCC's (Sharp Corner Clinching)
-No student has ever been spotted in the "open air seating" on the back left outside of the trolleys
-Now equipped with security cameras, churro machines, Anti-Biola propaganda, and a pizza party
-It's like a giant car with no seat belts. Fun and safe!

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